If you want to become a better leader, one of the best skills you can develop is coaching.
In The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier, the core idea is simple—but powerful:
Stop giving advice. Start asking better questions.
Many leaders believe they are coaching when they are actually just offering solutions. While this may feel helpful, it often prevents others from thinking for themselves and growing.
By asking better questions, you empower people to find their own answers, take ownership, and develop their capabilities.
Why the coaching habit matters
Developing a coaching mindset has several benefits:
1. It empowers your team
Instead of creating dependency, you build confidence and autonomy.
2. It improves focus
Better questions help cut through noise and get to what really matters.
3. It creates meaning
Coaching conversations help people connect their work to a bigger purpose.
The 7 coaching questions
Michael Bungay Stanier introduces seven essential questions that can transform your conversations:
1. What’s on your mind?
Start with an open question that invites the other person to share what matters most.
2. And what else?
Encourage deeper thinking and avoid stopping at the first answer.
3. What’s the real challenge here for you?
Help uncover the root of the problem.
4. What do you want?
Bring clarity to goals and expectations.
5. How can I help?
Let the other person define the support they need.
6. If you’re saying yes to this, what are you saying no to?
Highlight trade-offs and priorities.
7. What was most useful for you?
Reinforce learning and reflection.
Final thoughts
Great leadership is not about having all the answers.
It’s about asking the right questions.
By staying curious a little longer and resisting the urge to jump in with advice, you can create better conversations, stronger relationships, and more effective teams.
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